


Messy kitchens and 007 movies

by Keepcalmandshoot



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Jim is angry bc his kitchen is a mess, M/M, Sebastian finds a way to distract him, hehe, so he doesn't try and kill him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-17
Updated: 2016-05-17
Packaged: 2018-06-09 02:57:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6886657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Keepcalmandshoot/pseuds/Keepcalmandshoot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Moran!" Jim yells at him, and marches into the living room, stopping right in front of him.<br/>"Yes, what, I'm watching this movie-"<br/>"My kitchen is a <em>mess</em>. And it's <em>all</em> your fault!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Messy kitchens and 007 movies

When Jim storms out of the kitchen, Sebastian knows it's fight time already.  
"Moran!" Jim yells at him, and marches into the living room, stopping right in front of him.  
"Yes, what, I'm watching this movie-"  
"My kitchen is a _mess_. And it's _all_ your fault!"  
"I apologize" Sebastian says, still focused on the movie. "Could you please just move a little to your right if you're going to keep scolding me?"  
Jim's face goes red with rage- if some 007 movie wasn't going on on telly, Sebastian would have probably laugh at his expression.  
"You left _spaghetti_ all over my counter, my sink, and more importantly, my carpet. Is that all you've got to say?"  
"I'm very sorry" Sebastian replies, moving his own head to the left.  
That's it; James wraps his hands around Sebastian's neck and starts to threaten him.  
"I'm going to kill you" he hisses, "going to set fire to you and then _eat_ you as I roast you and cut you to tiny pieces into that very kitchen you just made a mess of-"  
Sebastian suddenly moves his head, and moves Jim too with the force of it. James falls on Sebastian's legs on the couch, and loses his grip on Sebastian's neck.  
The sniper immediately takes his wrists in his own hands, smirking at him as James struggles to free himself from his grip.  
"You should watch this with me" Sebastian laughs, still not letting him go. "It's actually interesting."  
"Going to _sssskinn_ you" James still threatens.  
"And make me into shoes, yeah" Sebastian just rolls his eyes, sounding utterly bored. It just gets Jim even angrier.  
Sebastian _loves_ to make him mad; there's something truly amazing in seeing his face go red with rage, but knowing that Jim won't actually hurt him.  
"You should change your repertory a little, it's getting old."  
Not even listening to Jim's reply, Sebastian presses a kiss to his cheek, and another, and another; on his nose, on his temple, on the corner of his mouth.  
"I'll count to three, and if you don't let me go-"  
Sebastian shuts him off with a kiss to his lips, moving his chin as Jim struggles to angle it perfectly with his own mouth. He can't help but smirk as he listen to James' protesting sounds, muffled by his own lips on his.  
"-by when I make it to-" Jim keeps talking, his words being cut off by Sebastian once again, "-three, I will definitely--"  
This time Jim falls silent, as Sebastian's hand finds its way into James' pants and then moves beneath his underwear, palming him through it lazily.  
"What, boss?" Sebastian smirks, feeling devious. "You'll what?"  
"-cut your hands off" James whimpers, always extremely sensitive to his touch. "Moran, don't you _dare_."  
"Don't I dare _what_?" he keeps teasing, satisfied with James' reactions. Then he completely changes the subject, looking down at his own hand moving underneath Jim's pants. "I love taking you off guard" he says, nibbling at the skin of his jaw.  
Jim is still sat uncomfortably on his lap, and Sebastian straddles his hips with his free hand, James going completely docile in his arms. That's something that happens from time to time, just when Jim is tired and won't fight back.  
Sebastian knows that- truth be told, he knows _Jim_ , and he does that pretty well-, and chuckles as he sees James forcing himself to stay quiet.  
The consulting criminal bites his own lower lip to stop a whine from leaving his mouth when Sebastian's hand slides inside his underwear, finally stroking his cock with a firm grip. When he pays particular attention to the head of it, James can't help but moan loudly.  
"Love it when you get vocal as well" Sebastian teases him, but he's honest with his words. He presses wet kisses to the column of James' neck, listening to his whines and getting hard just from them.  
James lowers his chin, stopping Sebastian from leaving marks on his bare, soft skin, and looks at him with his eyes half lidden. It's so erotic, just with that, that Sebastian feels his cock throb inside his jeans.  
"Stupid tiger" James purrs, hands finally free from Sebastian's grip, "thinking you can- _ah_ -have me under your control."  
"According to me, it's working pretty well" the sniper chuckles, kissing him just behind his ear. He knows that it's one of James' favorite spots.  
Jim doesn't answer, but lets out a soft whine as Sebastian unbottons his shirt to kiss his shoulder, leaving a purple bruise there as he bites the soft, white skin.  
His free hand comes to caress his inner tigh, tracing patterns in the naked skin. Jim whimpers once again, and Sebastian is getting so aroused- he wants James and James alone. Nothing else matters.  
And Jim finally comes with a strangled yell- he's impossibly beautiful as his face flushes red, his lips look swollen from him biting them, his eyes close and his mouth opens in such an amazing sound.  
Sebastian doesn't stop stroking him, waiting as he rides his orgasm. When James stops doing so, and lays his head on Sebastian's chest as he recovers his breath, Sebastian smiles. He lowers his own chin to leave a light peck on his lips.  
That's when, after one or two kisses, James stands up and stretches, yawning as he does so. Sebastian just stares at him, as his cock still aches for attention.  
"You know what? I'm not angry anymore. Actually, I'm pretty tired" the consulting criminal says, not even bothering to hide the devious smirk on his lips. "I expect my kitchen to be clean when I wake up tomorrow, though. So don't you disappoint me, or there will be consequences."  
He's already heading to the stairs, so Sebastian has to raise his voice a little to be heard. "But- But I- come on, Jim-"  
"What?" James asks, still smirking. "I'm sure you can take care of your _problem_ yourself. Plus, didn't you want to watch your movie? Now you can. See you tomorrow, darling!"  
Sebastian stares at him as he leaves the room, walking with such a grace that it looks like he's flying more that walking.  
He grimaces, looking down at his croch. 

_Damn_ he thinks, as Jim whistles particularly satisfied.

**Author's Note:**

> I suck at writing porn. Plus, English is not my first language. I apologize, but I hope you enjoyed this silly story anyway :)


End file.
